5th, 6th...deep breath...7th cycle and new diagnosis

My eyes and thoughts are too blury to explain...

12-1 The 5th cycle of chemo...pushed back another week, needing more time to recover from the 4th cycle.

12-2 Delivering Happiness town hall meeting...in a chemo induced haze... 

12-3 In my clothes from the event the night before, back in the infusion center bright and early for fluids, nuelasta shot & magnesium

12-6 Gillian took me for a visit with Dr. Lee and then to the infusion center for more fluids, and Shawn stayed over while Spike was out of town on business. 

12-8 More fluids and Madigan's visit to St. Mary's infusion Center

Special thanks to Jo and Gilly...Madigan is a brilliant distraction (ball, ball, ball, potty, treat, ball, ball, ball...), and I'm so grateful to have the company of my favorite furry companion through these rough days.

12-9 Spike and Lori take me to fulfill a dream and into restorative nature! Our first night camping in our 1997 VW Eurovan Camper in Morro Bay State Park.

12-10 Driving up Hwy. 1 from Morro Bay into Big Sur and Camping at Pfiefer Park.
 

 

12-14 More fluids and antibiotics

12-15 More fluids

12-17 More fluids and Magnesium

12-19 Me, Shawnifur, the rain and a whole lot of graphic love!

12-22 Nurse Cheri and I preparing for the 6th cycle and final taxol/carboplatnin!

12-23 Dr. Peggy giving me the magic neulasta shot, 3 bags of fluids, super anti-nausea medicine and magnesium to get me through X-mas!

Merry X-mas to me...done with 6 cycles of hard chemo: taxal and carboplatnin with herceptain!

12-24 We woke up, held each other and cried...knowing that we made it through the bad stuff...together.

X-mas morning presents, brunch and tub time with Spike and J-Fab!

Full of steroids and a combination of anti-nausea medication, with everyone's help, we had our 1st time hosting gelatinous family x-mas/white elephant gift exchange at our home.

12-26-27 Monkey brain...two day swollen from all of the steroids, anti-nausea medicine and food...holiday hangover in bed.

12-28 in the infusion center for more fluids and magnesium

12-29 Madigan, my protector, keeping me down in bed.

12-31-10 NYE Feast hosted by Pete, Lori, Jimmy and Ruby. I can eat again without nausea medication!

1-4 Spike's B-day, stepping back into work...meeting with colleagues this week.

1-7 Eye examination and many tests at the Optometrist Dr. Sharon Lee

1-10 Roy Gardner passed in his sleep. My heart is heavy for my dear friend. R.I.P. Roy, thanks for the laughter and love AND special thanks for bringing your legacy, Sara, into this world!

1-13 Back into the office...trying to get up to speed...with or without being able to see.

1-14 Optomologist Dr. Kevin Lee diagnosis me with an eye disease called Iritis in both eyes and prescribes steroid drops. http://www.iritis.org/index.php Then I do my 7th cycle of chemo (Herceptain only now) in the new infusion center at St. Mary's. Good news: My hair is growing back! Bad news: My WBC dropped again, and I'm still anemic...needing more iron and more tests...

It's taken me a month and a half to write this post. My eyes are so bad now, I can only look at the screen for a few minutes before my eyes pulse, tear and blur. I haven't driven since before Thanksgiving. So, much has happened, and the dust is still settling. It's challenging, to go slow, be gentle, take time...It's been about 10 months, since my diagnosis -the shattering, and I'm still cleaning up the shards of glass that once focused my vision before cancer. Still, the hard chemo is done, I've gone from 11 medications a day to 3, there's only 5 more cycles of herceptain to do (I should be done by the end of April) and each day I wake up and am so very grateful to be alive...even if not in the life or body I remember. I never left the myself, my love, hope, so with that I'm doing what I can each day; making my way back into to work, workouts, yoga and life with new vision even if blurred and sporatic!